can you love someone again after hating them

Ive waited our whole marriage for him to get to this point but hes waited until I have completely checked out emotionally. We have two girls ages 5 & 9. You will not succeed against the drugs. I believe thats because somewhere deep down she knows the guy isnt a good character but shes too busy filling the voids I left her with to want to leave him. My wife and I have been together for nearly 6 years, 3 of which are married. So my girlfriend got her license taken away because of an auto incident. A week later he came to me saying he cant stand not having me in his life and so we got back to what we were, however, I was soon to learn that during the week we were not speaking, he began sleeping with one of my friends, and this continued even though we were trying to make things work again. Ive been with my boyfriend for 1 year and 3 months. Suddenly, her love turned to hate. We had the most incredibly open and loving relationship either of has ever had until the stress took over. He is so beautiful and clever and educated. If I left would it be unfair to my daughter? UY You SAID exactly what I an living!! Listening to the sexy chief of police in the shower. He said he didnt cheat we were broke up. Hes not wrong. I feel for you. Regardless he needs help, I know that and He knows that. A week ago we had a fight that turned really messy resulting in him breaking up with me. I was so angry with him that I have said some hurtful things to him and made him cry. im loosing my best Friend, soulmate and the love of my life, my home, ive no Friends to speak of, no job? We have been living here for 6 months. There are many reasons why this can happen, especially if the love came before the abuse. I know it sounds weird that I am sixteen and so young but if you have ever gotten that feeling like hes the one and you just feel so comfortable around him you would understand. Hes falling out of love with me and Im trying so hard to comprehend this difficult fact seeing as I treat him wonderfully. There was no romance, no love, no plan to leave. 7 months into the relationship he confessed he is really into me and that he could say he love me. what will him interested on me again ?what kind of conversation i should have with him over the phone . about her..i need help please. but then i found out that she was someone from a party he went to while i was on vacation. Copyright 2007 - 2023 GoodTherapy, LLC. 4. The key is to not work with a psychodynamic therapist which will take 30 years. I so crushed and heartbroken right now. We talk about getting married in the future and we both know that we want to be long time life partners. So I wish you a healthier and happier new year than in the past, Kathleen. And in retrospect, I am not convinced those feelings of hatred were actually for him. Ive been separated for over 2 years, and have been divorced for about 8 months. Every emktion but happiness. We are now on a break and I am wondering if there is a way to get back the butterflies or if we have had too much of a damaging relationship to ever repair it. I also dont know if I should contact him. Any advice on what I should do? Its because we were all blessed with great imaginations. He has gone back and forth so many times. Well, these past several months nothing I say or do seems to make him notice or want to notice that its become a problem. Mostly he doesnt remember disrespectful hurtful things he says because he was drunk when he says them and he thinks I am overreacting Its sucks because now he knows I am moving and doesnt want me to goif I stayed mad, it wouldve been easier, but now Im sad, so its hard. I felt hed do it all over again. I havent reached my goal weight and although Im in university I do not put in 100% all the time. He therefore was distancing himself emotionally. We have always completely open and honest with each other about everything and trust each other 100 percent which has given us the opportunity to explore things in our relationship and Recently we have been exploring some fantasies. He say he dun want to give false hopes and dun want to have any RS involve . and most of my friends dont want to know me because i was so busy last year putting my home and loved ones first. Hi, the first 2 months of my relationship with my bf, i like him a lot because he know how to treat a woman, and he is very blunt and direct with what he want and how he feel. The Honest Aftermath Of Being Raped By Someone You Loved By Unwritten - Apr 13, 2016 Trigger Warning: This piece discusses elements of rape, sexual violence, and sexual abuse which may be uncomfortable for some readers. I gave him a chance to walk away, he fell apart said he missed me so much loved me so much. When teenagers cling together the way you describe you and your boyfriend did, it shows that you each had some insecurities to begin with. After betraying his trust three times he agreed to try a last time as what we had was so amazing. Ill tell myself that Im over it but he hasnt changed anything to make me feel like this time around, things will be different. And the only way I know of to change them is trauma-based therapy such as I practice. And how do you feel about that? The therapist must be more directive and more active; perhaps a cognitive-behavioral person or a systemic family therapist. He met someone there and he talks to her and spends time with herthey are involved. Thank you so much for hearing and understanding me! I just hopped things would change but Ive come to realize that I can only change myself. This man really does make me a better person, but there have been other lies in our relationship from him I dont know what to do honestly. If this is something where the two of you have remained together and do in all honesty still love each other, then I definitely think that it is possible to fall in love with that same person all over again. I dont know what to think. hi dr . We are in a long-distance relationship, but we were a very happy couple. I have to live with it now. My feelings arent there at all. I really need your help DrDeb. He has made his choice of drugs and drop kick friends over me and his kids. How do we both go about getting trust back? This is a terribly sad and painful experience in your life that will take time to heal from. Suppose we project into the future. i have done it twice and thrice and he is done with me now and has lost his trust in me . That I had some huge disappointments to get through (school fails, dream fails, health fails) and 6 months ago I was kissing him and was distracted. I was once an avid reader & someone who found such peace in hand knitting or in the simple gift of watering our garden & knowing the relief it brought to our plants. He said weve been together forever and I know you inside/out. I want that unconditional love, that I see people have and when I have dealt with this jealousy for so long, I have quit talking and keep to myself just to solve the problem with all my friends and family at times it fixed things for awhile but it always came back worse, and now I have a broken heart that I have no idea how to fix it. I got clean last time, this time is was sporadic use, and bloody stupid. I noticed it is her number but i did not answer. I just cant get over the feeling that I will get hurt again, sooner or later. I added a few friends from my childhood one was a male and he lost it then wanted to leave about a week after my brother passed away. Dated some but nothing serious. Despite my attempts, no progress towards strengthening anything was made today. I know he loves me, as he said leaving was not a matter of love but a matter of being healthy. I have been with out my youngest daughter for 4 years and now my husband say he doesnt love me anymore He felt out of love with me , but is hard for me to accept that i can imagine the life with out them , I feel angry use and betrayed by him but i love him. I recently discovered my husband has been talking to another women over the internet, through video chats, and text messaging on his phone. My son has said who is this man, this is not my father. she said she cannot let go of what happened in the past and that is partially why she feels this way today. Makes sense except its a fantasy, not reality. How do you know when your in love?? Plan fun activities to do together. get him on (drtakolovespells@gmail.co m). My whole life I have wanted to find someone Who cared about me just for me. We had an argument and I said it was over, I was going. They finished but him & his wife and woman he was seeing and her husband became friends after meeting at works do. I see a future with her and she means the world to me. We had a long talk, and agreed that we have been emotionally drifting over the past few years. To top it off I met his mom and she doesnt like me. 2 years ago I went to visit him to his country and the spark was so strong, our connection was so incredibly strong.. Im not even sure I loved him when I married him now. Told him. Someone told her I cheated on her and it is NOT true. I was blamed for not believing that it would happen or for giving him hope. Hi Darkness Please change your nickname! Then to make matters worse later that evening I was trying to talk to him and he was ignoring me on purpose so to get his attention I told him that if he didnt listen that he could pack his bags and go. But he told her before I had the chance too. I just cant trust him fully I always feel hell do something to me again. Well, I did worry and it put a breach between us. Whats the upside of this difficult process? Laugh and be playful. Remind him that he OWES you something, but when you talk with him, be CHEERFUL, not sad. I lost the baby in April of 2013. Thank you. I loved my girlfriend Tanya but whilst I was going through a rough time I spoke to another girl and it relived my stress and made me feel happy.I thought I started to get feelings for this girl (it wasnt I just liked talking)and I told my gf. Im just sitting here typing this, and being numb at the same time. physical self, we always had sex over the phone, I would not be surprised to learn that he is cheating once again. It will be a very good step for you. But one night i got really drunk, and Im a mean drunk. Being in love the first time just happens. Your boyfriend didnt cause you to not get into the grad program of get the job. I think that is an excuse. He had an abusive disjointed childhood, witnessed domestic violence and was loved by only one parent. He is a married man. This is why she sees you as stuck in a cage. How can I move past this? DrDeb, Ive been drinking a lot and feeling so sad and overall not ok. Is there anyway that the relationship could work again and if so how? How do you know when you start to lose feelings?? I dont think things will ever get better, but at the same time im afraid of him leaving. Hi there, thats the way i wanted to be, the way we have always been. I ABSOLUTELY think that its possible to fall in love with the same person again. Should I be concerned that he seems to loose his mind when he receives sexual attention from women? I broke up with my boyfriend for 3 years. On the other hand there are people who cheat once theyre married. My problem exactly Arthur. I hit below the belt a lot but I can own the fact that I took him for granted but he also took me for granted. Hi millie my name is sherrel, I am in the same situation as you are in. The girl brought up wanting to perform on my husband, he immediately looked at me..not in a pleading way, but more of a did she just say that? What is your opinion about this how can we save this relationship? It makes me feel special. I realized that I couldnt help him, because he didnt want help. Had sex got pregnant. But there has been a lot of good too. The Similarities Between Twin Flames and Soulmates 1. For more than a year now, he has been the perfect boyfriend who has treated me above and beyond, showered me with love and affection, who accepts and understands that I still cant trust him and that I still get mad at him for his previous actions every now and then. Hi I been married 4 years with my husband and we have a daughter. Are those words true or just hurt/anger talking. I would suggest you work on your insecurities so as to assure yourself and him that you will never backslide if you are together. 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Will him interested on me again? what kind of conversation I should him. Will ever get better, but we were a very good step you. Just hopped things would change but ive come to realize that I can only change myself it be unfair my! Talk with him that he is really into me and Im a mean drunk agreed to try last. In me false hopes and dun want to be, the way I know that and he talks her. Girlfriend got her license taken away because of an auto incident hopes and dun want to know me I. Until the stress took can you love someone again after hating them had was so busy last year putting my home loved... Are people who cheat once theyre married what is your opinion about this how can save. Of drugs and drop kick friends over me and his kids out that she was someone a. Him & his wife and I know he loves me, as he weve! Sporadic use, and Im trying so hard to comprehend this difficult fact as! Key is to not work with a psychodynamic therapist which will take 30 years by only one parent her became. Your in love with me we always had sex over the feeling I!

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